Friday 16th July

Bugs, consider this an official warning.
If the biting doesn't stop soon I'm going to start biting back.
I fed an old lady cake.
Me and Suma went to Jyodhi's mum's birthday celebrations today after visiting her other school briefly.
I was left in a room with a number of people and, without explanation, one by one they started to leave until it was just me and a girl of about 12yrs old who I later found out to be Lakshmi.

Silence.
Lydia:Do you speak English? Hopeful smile.
Lakshmi, confused face until the word 'English' at which she confidently shook her head.
Silence.
Mutual Smiles.
Exit Lakshmi.

Eventually people drifted back and Jyodhi took us to the party. She speaks quickly and in a thick accent; a few times I gave delayed reactions as I didn't notice the quick switch from Telugu to English!
She was explaining that Lakshmi was an orphan with little education. She witnessed her mother and father's deaths and consequently has quite a nervous disposition; after being spoilt byu her foster mum she became lax in her school work and attendance and was sent to Gideon and Suma who hope to have 5 orphans by this year and 10 by the next.
She had run away from the first time, about 15 days ago, saying that she was going back for more clothes.
When we arrived we were ushered into the one room with AirCon (a small side bedroom) and talked for a while, well I mainly listened to the Telugu chatter and attempted to make a dent in the vast amount of fruit they had brought me.
Then everyone left, again, for the Telugu prayer celebration thing that was in honour of the b-day girl (61) but not before Suma informed me that I was requested to say a few words! So I fretted for a while and then figured I'd just make something up and went to sleep.
When it was 'time' I made a short speech to the 20-30 women about how I was glad to be there and it seemed that they all were very happy sharing the love of God and each other in this remote-ish part of the world (getting there was pretty interesting!). I said I didn't have much to say but I hope she has a very happy birthday.
A lot of smiling took place and I was promptly declared her granddaughter whilst held in a death grip for some photos.
Following this I, Fidgetbottom McGee, sat through over an hour and a half (two hours?) of Telugu prayer, Telugu declarations of faith, Telugu Christian witnesses, Telugu preaching, Telugu wailing and Telugu nodding of heads and shouting Hallelujah. They were all women, which made me a little uncomfortable considering the HABs (Husbands and Boyfriends) that just sat watching in an odd restricted sort of way...
It was only later that Suma explained I had taken part in a pentecostal sisters meeting.
During the mother's closing 10 minute ''thank-you and goodnight'' they brought out a reeeeally yummy looking cake (bear in mind that at the prospect of 6-weeks without cake is enough to make any cake look 'reeeeally yummy' to Lyds...) and my head was occupied (engaged for the first time in well over 2hrs!) with: Make! Me cake? What cake? Yummy cake? Do I get some... how?
As it turns out, I did get some. I was called to the front, required to join in with what seemed like an endless rendition of ''Happy Birthday To You'' and then instructed to help her cut the cake.
Fair enough.
UNTIL, the woman next to me (on stage it was: old lady, close friends and family, me) took a piece of cake in her hands and fed it into the mouth of the birthday girl who then reciprocated. Panic stricken I watched as the turned to me, motioned to the cake and then moved out the way. So I did, having to then hold position whilst posing for the cameras thinking only one thing: "Please don't let me miss her mouth while facing the other way!!".
It's ok, I didn't!
So I fed her cake and she fed me cake and then a long line, made up of various members of the congregation, formed and proceed to continue the process of feeding and being fed by her. I like this tradition and will be instigating it next April.
She must have had the equivalent of four or five regular slices!

"English Girls are not used to wearing sleeves."
Random old female relative of birthday-girl: (via Jyodhi's translation) Did you buy these clothes in India?
I look down at my oh-so-India Chudidaar outfit. Duh. But ok, fair enough - it's a conversation starter!
Me: yep *nods and smiles to add emphasis*
ROFROB: Yes I thought you did. *nods knowingly*
Jyodhi:You are not used to wearing full sleeves no?
Lydia: *confusion*
-Mainly because a Chudidaar has short sleeves-
Lydia:Urm no I'm not...?
Jyodhi:Yes I thought so, *drifts into anecdote of her 9 year old Australian niece who wears spaghetti straps*

Strike two India. Strike two.