Monday 26th July

Be careful what you wish for.
So imagine your first day at work (or school). Remember the nerves? The slightly sick feeling that is those nerves mixed with excitement?
Now imagine you have had no training for that job. You didn't even know you were going until the night before, it wasn't confirmed until that morning and you that had been waiting and semi-preparing for something different.
Now add to this the fact that not only are you the only person of your skin colour but also the only one who speaks English. Staff and students included.
Imagine you speak next to nothing of their language.
Now imagine they hadn't been told you were coming.
So you turn up, late, and everyone there looks at you with great expectations, the person who brought you takes you to a crowded room in which there is clearly not enough room for you and says ''here you are, see you later''.
*Fear*
Then you get taken to another room after you just stand there in disbelief. You sit in the chair to which you were directed.
And you think, hey, if I can come to a foreign country not knowing anyone, move in with some strangers, many geckos and a rat and I can sit through hours of Telugu worship, I'm up for a challenge. Right?
So there I was, ready and willing to put my hand to whatever task presents itself and decide to go have a 'conversation' with one of the students and see if I can help improve their work or gauge their understanding.
*Looks at a student's book*
Right.
Telugu.
I'll just sit here then.
About an hour later Gideon returns from whatever errands he's been running: ''Right, I'm going home then".
Right.
Help?
Gid: ''Do you want to come? I'll pick you up later ok?''
Lyd: ''No I'M COMING"

Feeling? Apart from humiliation? Guilt, inadequacy and general all round embarrassment.
Same again tomorrow then?
Somehow, no.

On the upside!
We went out to help package food for the homeless, which was loads of fun! We all sat around this bowl of curry and one woman spooned it into bags while we all tied them up. Then we went on to the train station where lots of homeless people 'live' and handed out packages of warm foods and donated clothes. Really picked up my mood. I can do anything ;)

Chalk the whole morning up to experience and get on with life =] x